About birthday’s, lifetime decisions, changes and memories.


Finally I am fancy for this.

Writing down something new.
This was quite a bit of a break, but anyways.
It’s my birthday tomorrow and I didn’t really get excited when someone reminded me of it during today.
The excitement kind of fades with the years, which is actually pretty sad.
It makes you feel so grown up. By thinking back I definitely want to be a 7 year old again, playing in the garden, livin‘ the no-worries-life.

But life gives us so many happy moments in every period of it.
So I really want to feel thankful and appreciate the last year I could have lived, filled of love, friendship and new adventures.
I even appreciate the rough and hard times life gave me sometimes, they taught me to stand up again and work harder for what I wanted.
They also taught me to overlook some things, safe in the knowledge that they won’t be important to me anymore in a couple of years from now on, maybe even days, hours or minutes.

I tried to think back on the little and fulfilling things which made my life more livable, brighter and even more beautiful as it already is, the past 364 days of the year.
There were a couple of things, which defo came straight through my mind.

I realised that I loved the moment when I was on a long car ride to Italy with two of my friends, listening to music. It’s pretty much like reading. You completely zone out. You forget your troubles and everyone else who’s not with you in this very moment. You are focused on that one thing. That one thing only. You are so content and everything seems so peaceful.

I appreciate so many moments I had with my friends and family – just talking.
We mostly ended up at a completely different topic as we actually started.
We forgot about the time, the day.

I even appreciate the evenings we just got wasted and don’t even remember anymore.

I appreciate the 1000 of pictures we took. We laughed, we cried, we danced and we slept – drunk, facedown in the grass.
But it was fun, it gives me something to hold on to.

Memories that never fade.

I know that there are a lot of rough times life has in store for you, times which make you stop, which make you feel like nothings gonna fall back in it’s place anymore. Things and words which hurt you deeply.
But you need to know:
When people act shady allow them.
Even if people betray your trust allow them too.
But make sure, to never ever sink to their level. Never.
Their choices are a direct reflection of who they are – not who you are!
No matter how angry, sad, hurt or disappointed you may be, please make sure they won’t make you bitter. I think the only option to ride out a situation like this, is to be better. To react with love.
And yes – sometimes that means, to retaliating with acceptance and sheer silence, which may be hard for a lot of us. It’s hard for me as well, to be honest.
But whatever it is, make sure it benefits you as a human being instead of lowering you into a position which you would rather not be in!

Normal people don’t go around destroying other human beings. 

Only those who are confused, lost and hurt due to pain. Don’t be one of them. Just take the lessons and move on gracefully.

That’s actually pretty much what I go through sometimes. All of us do.
We try to be happy and most of the time we are. But sometimes we can’t. We don’t find something to delight in. We just feel lost. Sometimes your smile is fake, you pretend that everything is fine – even if you just want to break down and cry.

Everyone goes through this moments in life. It’s part of your life.
But if you gonna end up in a situation like this for the next time remember things like this:

  • flowers
  • long hugs
  • smiles
  • smell of rain
  • starry nights
  • falling in love
  • holding hands
  • getting lost in a book
  • random acts of kindness
  • leaves falling from the trees in fall
  • the smell of freshly cut grass
  • morning mist on untouched fields
  • long showers
  • loud music
  • long car rides



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